PITTSBURGH – MAY 04: TV commentator Mike Milbury works between the benches in the game between the Pittsburgh Penguins and the New York Rangers during game five of the Eastern Conference Semifinals of the 2008 NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs on May 4, 2008 at the Mellon Arena in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. The Penguins defeated the Rangers 3-2 in overtime to win the series 4 games to 1. (Photo by Bruce Bennett/Getty Images)

This Week in NHL Stupid: The Mike Milbury edition

Welcome once again to This Week in NHL Stupid, where we track the ugly, the silly, and the just plain stupid in the world of hockey. Now, some things in life are stupid by their very nature. It’s understood, and what is understood doesn’t need to be discussed. For example, if we at Puck Drunk Love assigned somebody to verbate everything that Mike Milbury said during pre-game, intermission, and post-game shows on television, we could find something to write about every week in this column. (Luckily, our editors aren’t cruel.) Milbury infuriates hockey fans to the point where the one thing that unites fans of rival teams is that Milbury probably shouldn’t be on television. So that stupidity is understood. We don’t need to discuss it here.

But when Milbury hacks off a whole fan base and not just me, it’s worth noting. So when he said that Joe Louis Arena “was a dump when it opened and it’ll be a dump the day they close it”, it’s a good excuse to remind all of you, especially you Red Wings fans a few things about Milbury:

  • He once traded Roberto Luongo to make room for Rick DiPietro.
  • He traded Zdeno Chara and the pick that landed Jason Spezza for Alexei Yashin, then signed Yashin to a 10-year contract worth $90 million.
  • He once beat a hockey fan with his own shoe.

So remember, what is understood doesn’t need to be discussed. Until the next time he says something that makes an entire fan base light up their torches. And this could very well be next week.

So who else was stupid this week? How about goalies? First, the Penguins and the Capitals slammed home fifteen goals in one game …

And then the Rangers and Stars went 7-6 on us …

And this game came after Henrik Lundqvist let in five goals in two periods including three in just over a minute against Montreal during their previous game. Henrik Lundqvist!!! What in the world is going on here?

Thank goodness Lundqvist held the Leafs to two goals on Thursday. I told someone the Rangers won 5-2 and was asked “so does that mean Lundqvist isn’t broken anymore?”

Oh, and how about Blues goalie Jake Allen, who somehow managed to get replaced twice in the same game?

Goalies were broken and stupid this week. (And Mike Milbury just traded for all of them.)

But not quite as stupid as not having the right sized piece of glass ready in Anaheim. On Thursday, Eric Gelinas broke a pane of glass with a wicked shot. The Honda Center crew apparently didn’t have a piece of glass that fit that space and had to cut a new piece, even though the glass behind the goal is the most likely to be broken by shots.

And because of this nonsense, the teams had to play a third period which was 29 minutes and 48 seconds long. Thirty minute halves was how hockey was played before 1910. So congratulations, Honda Center. Because while goalies only set hockey back to the 80’s this week, you set hockey back 107 years … when they didn’t have glass behind the net.

That’s all for this week. Join us next week when Mike Milbury beats a goalie with a broken pane of glass.