CHICAGO, IL – DECEMBER 06: Mike Smith #41 of the Arizona Coyotes knocks the puck away against the Chicago Blackhawks at the United Center on December 6, 2016 in Chicago, Illinois. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)

This Week in NHL Stupid: When goalies go rogue

Welcome once again to This Week in NHL Stupid, where we track the ugly, the silly and the stupid in the world of hockey. If you’ve never read this feature before, think of it as calling out somebody for dropping Jonathan Toews in their fantasy league. I make that analogy because that actually happened this past week! Seriously. Not in my league. That wouldn’t be tolerated in my league because that person knows they’d be berated until the end of time, just like the guy that drafted Calle Johansson first overall. Yes, that actually happened too.

But that’s fantasy. Let’s talk about reality, where Cory Schneider of the Devils must have thought that goalies assists count in fantasy leagues after seeing him think about a rink-long pass on Friday. Let’s see how that turned out:

Answer: Not well … not well.

Well at least Schneider’s split second lack of focus served as a lesson to other goalies to always be careful when thinking about or attempting long passes. I mean, goalies aren’t required for that and it’s not their job. Goalies, as evidenced by Schneider, should only be worried about making the simple pl…

For God’s sake, that wasn’t even five hours later! And that lost a game in overtime!!! Which probably explains why Smith was even thinking about that pass, because it was 3-on-3. But nevertheless, Smith gives up the weirdest goals.

And he has the angriest reactions.

Poor Mike Smith. But hey, he made the All-Star team so maybe he can go all Hulk Smash on national television!

(Yes, Mike Smith made the All-Star team. At 7-11-5.)

But now to other stupid: Did you know that the Wisconsin women’s hockey team had a carbon monoxide scare? It’s true. They played through a game where the carbon monoxide levels were at 200 parts per million where the acceptable level was 9 per million. Players had to be treated at local hospitals after the game, but thankfully everybody was fine. And the game was cancelled the next day as officials tried to figure out what was wrong.

Now here’s the stupid part:

Wentzville fire chief Mike Marlo said the arena is not required to have a carbon monoxide detection monitor unless the ice making process creates carbon monoxide materials.

Marlo added he will be recommending the university install a carbon monoxide detection system.

Now I had no idea that an ice making process could create carbon monoxide materials. But you would think that if people who know better had known that, a detector would be installed just as a safety measure. I mean … they cost $20. So it’s stupid, and frugal.

Now to some non-life threatening stupid: The San Jose Sharks paid little attention to detail on Wednesday night, as they had Paul Martin in the lineup against Calgary. Martin skated in warmups, but a foot injury proved too painful for him to play through, so Mirco Mueller would slide in to take his place.

One problem: The Sharks had already submitted their lineup card with Martin written in. So Mueller, after playing 1:09, had to leave the game because he wasn’t legal. The Sharks played the rest of the game with five defensemen … one of which was playing his first NHL game. Marc Eduard Vlasic and Brent Burns played 26-27 minutes each, and the Sharks lost 3-2 to the Flames. There’s no doubt that the Sharks lost a game in large part because of a clerical error. In many ways, that’s worse than losing a game because your goalie wanted to make a rink-long pass.

And finally, WWE personality Brock Lesnar broke a sacred hockey rule this week:

That rule being: Do not place your foot on a team logo that was intentionally woven onto the floor of our locker room  … floors being where feet usually go … in extra large size.

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